Today we’re gonna do something a little different. One of my boys and I were having a convo the other day and he was telling me I should write about a relationship-based convo we had reently. Now, I was drunk out of my mind so I only remembered parts of it, but in my genius, I said, “Hey, why don’t you write it. You’re a good writer. Make it happen.” So today, I’m handing over Gidi Hub to another Gidi Hub Author, to kick a one-off post that all men need to read. Take heed to the words that he spits.
Lagos has allowed me to ramble a little bit and I want to use that privilege to help my fellow men across the world in their pursuit of happiness…
What is it that would make men happy, you might ask yourself. Well that is a good damn question. I have had a few years to ponder this question. In our youth, we think that it is stuff like money, fame, devilish good looks, chics, etc. When you get in your 20′s, you think it is a job that you don’t despise going to each morning, a full head of hair, having less than 30 percent body fat. But when you get to 30, you start to see the big picture…there is one thing and one thing only that really makes men happy. Not getting into constant, senseless arguments with women…
Truer words were never spoken. Women are some unstable creatures…some of whom unleash a wrath comparable to God’s punishment of Jobor Ike’s boot beating of Tina.
So true happiness is figuring out how to avoid this wrath. And I, ladies and gentlemen, have found the satisfaction guaranteed, fool-proof method to avoid confusion and confrontation with the female gender. The trick is to use one of these three phrases when you are staring down the eyes of a crazed woman…
- You’re right…my bad…
- I know…I apologize…
- That’s cool…I can wait…
What is funny is that I told women about this and they were like “this crap would never work…women are not going for that”. Three minutes after that was said, I tried it on someone and what do you know…It worked!!!! Why does it work so well??? Because women want to be right so bad, when you agree with them, they are in heaven. And when they are in heaven, we men are in heaven…
Though women say they don’t like drama…they love it. They covet it. They hold onto it so tight, that it is a diamond after they let it go. On the other hand, men will confront drama but we are a peace-loving people. Women will make statements like “oh, I don’t have any female friends…they are catty and always causing drama”. What dude have you ever heard say such a thing??? Empirical evidence shows that women are a thousand times more likely to start some drama than men are. With facts like these, men need to arm themselves with the weapons to combat drama…our happiness depends on it…
So the next time that your female friend says “all men are dogs…I can’t even stand looking at you”, you respond by saying “I know…I apologize” or “you’re right…my bad”. Even if the faux understanding does not get you to third base, it will alleviate all symptoms of drama and even bring a smile to your face at the ease of its implementation. Vary up your responses a bit and you will find that drama-free life is definitely in your future. Happiness is just around the corner…
.jpg)
Comments
Post a Comment